Tales from the poop files

[Csara]

For some reason when you become a parent, particularly a mom, poop becomes a major topic of conversation. From how often a day your kid is going to what color and consistency, there is no shame in the poop talkin' game! Moms have a ton of questions about newborn poop, breast milk poop, formula poop, my-kid-just-started-solids poop, toddler poop and that's as far as I've come at this point with the inquiries. Now I'm at or pretty darn close to the potty teaching stage. I imagine there is a lot more conversation on poop to be had in my future. In the mean time, let me share a funny tale with you.

Yesterday morning, my 2 year old son tells me he wants to go swimming. I'm thrilled. It's scorching outside and he needs to practice his swimming. So, I slather him up in sunscreen and we get changed into our swimsuits (or baby soups as my son refers to them). We go in the backyard, I open the pool gate and he runs to the pool steps. Next thing I know he's saying with big enthusiasm "doooooodie" and jumps into the pool, as these strange little pieces start floating up to the top. Ewww! My kid just pooped in the pool. So, I take him out, rip off his swim diaper and hose off his butt. Then he goes running. He squatted in like 6 different places around my backyard and took a dump in each spot. Nice. I was picking up after my son like he's a dog. It was quite the scene. Me with paper towels, a garbage bag and a hose....hosing off the deck and my son's butt every time he ran by.

Do you have any funny poop stories to share?

[KeelyKay]

At G's first well baby check (1 week) we told his pedi that he hadn't pooped since he was 2 days old and all the meconium had flushed his system. She said it was pretty normal for a bf'd baby to go a few days, but to go home and take a rectal temp. Her exact words were, "It will help get things moving again." Thanks, lady... you could have been more specific. Later that night, after DH and I debated the thought of shoving a thermometer up DS's tiny tush we finally decided to give it a shot (after all, it had been 5 days!). We went into G's room and put him on the changing table and got his pants off. I handed DH the thermometer, and he took off G's diaper. G was sound asleep, so we questioned whether or not we should actually try it. "No better time... he'll probably sleep through it." I held his little legs up by his belly while DH took his temp. G let out a sharp little squeal (not because of the thermometer), DH pulled out the thermometer, and out shot (yes shot) a flood of seedy, yellow poop. It squirted about 3 feet across the room and plastered G's bedroom door. It pooled under DS, soaking his onesie. It sprayed the recieving blanket, waiting to wrap him in comfort. The explosive poo splattered across DH and he ran from the room gagging. After the initial shock, I laughed and cleaned it up. I still laugh every time I think about it. Such a horrible moment.

[Csara]

LOL, Keely! I have a few stories like that as well. I didn't even have to stick a thermometer up there, I just had to lift my son's legs and the poop went flying!!! It got stuck to the closet door and I was actually sitting there scraping off each individual groove. UGH!

[KeelyKay]

Diapers should come with warning labels. That was the first of our poop problems. DS can take off his diaper now (every time his hand touches his diaper, he remembers he can grab the tabs )... no idea how to make him stop, so he always has a onesie on. I had to shampoo the carpet after his last diaper removal .

[yonksgirl]

OMG C that is too funny!


When Ashley was about 2 1/2 she had some fun. She wasin a toddler bed and should have been takinga nap....Well I went to check on her, when I walked in her door it stank. I asked her is she poopied she said yes so I went to change her pull up and it was clean.....I asked her again And again she said yes....I asked her well where is it then...She lookedme dead in the eyes and said "it's in the drawer" I went over and opened up the bottom drawer and there it was shehad emptied all her clothing out sat on theedge and pooped then closedthe drawer! I started to laugh so hard I could not breath! That was all I could do was laugh!

[Angel78]

that reminds me of when I was little. Apparently, when I was supposed to be napping, I was inspired to be artistic. And since there were no crayons available to Little Baby Angel in Her Crib, I used what WAS available and finger-painted a lovely piece of work on the wall, in poop.

What I have to look forward to, eh?

[Deana]

Ella has been spending a lot more time in the exersaucer and the bumbo, which for some reason makes her poop. And whenever we have an 'exerpooper', it goes all the way up her back, up to her shoulderblades. We have to do gymnastics to get her outfit off without getting poop in her hair. Poor girl.

And now that Nicole is totally potty trained, she is obsessed with poop and poopie art. She will poop and tell me that "it looks like an aligator" or whatever else is the art of the day. She also ALWAYS blows her poopie a kiss before flushing it

Nicole is also obsessed with gas-passing... she will say, "mommy, did you hear that??" and laugh... and then say, "I just had a little hart" (she can't really say 'f' yet). I hope this wears off before the prom...

[pink_elephant]

ROFL!!!

I so needed a good laugh today.

Deana... Andy always had those horrendous exersaucer poops as well... I don't know what it is about the exersaucer, but it inspires som bodily functions!

Andy has yet to poop anywhere without his diaper on, however he can get that thing off in a heartbeat when he wants to!!!! He loves to point, aim and fire and pee all over stuff. UGH! Its so funny but still, LOL

[CC21]

DH told J that farts are "barking spiders" so now everytime he passes gas, he says "oh, there was a barking spider!" If you ask him where it was he says "In my butt!!"

[yonksgirl]

Ashley got me another time too! She keeps me on my toes! LOL! I was holding her on my hip rushing around the house, in true mommy fashion. She pooped with out me knowing and some how got her diaper off while she was still on my hip. Well my DH walked into the kitchen and quick walked back out and then was back with the video camera laughing...he kept talking to me laughing, all of the sudden I smelled something and went to check her diaper when I realize there is no diaper. I had poop all down the side of me! I started to laugh so hard and could not stop! LOL!!!! She is 4 now so I am hoping he poop stories are over!