To be a Fly on the Wall…and A Thousand Bucks Lying Around…

So another school year is back in full swing. This is the first year I get to experience having my children in preschool, and only because I’m teaching at the preschool myself. I teach K-4, Robbie is in K-3 and Andrew is in the 2’s. So I always hear parents say things like, “Oh, to be a fly on the wall of my child’s classroom.� Let me tell you, I actually get to experience this, and the things I catch my boys doing…not to mention the little 4-year-old students in my class! I have a notebook that I’m constantly writing down the funny things they say.

One little boy was eating a tuna fish sandwich for lunch one day, and I noticed he was staring at it pretty hard. Next thing I knew, he looked up at me and said in a small voice, “Miss Traci? I think there’s people in my sandwich. I think.� Another child insists he’s fifty-nine years old. I went around the classroom, asking the children how old they are. Each said, four, except the little old man who swears up and down that he’s fifty-nine.

Then every mother’s dream come true – I’ll peek across the hall and look in Robbie’s room to see him sitting at his table surrounded by his classmates, looking like a little angel. He’ll look up at me and say, “Hi, Mommy!� And then my heart turns to butter in acid rain. Andrew, on the other hand…

…And this is the downside of teaching at the same school your kids attend. Andrew is still going through the “I see Momma over there, and she should be holding me� syndrome. I have to be careful to sneak around Andrew, because once he starts crying for me, it’s hard to get him to stop. Not to mention my heart breaking into a million fragile pieces when I hear him. But when he is calm, he has a blast in school and loves to paint with sponges.

The other downside is that my kids are the hardest ones to lay down for naptime, because Mommy is in the nap room, too, and therefore, it must be time to play with Mommy. Andrew will eventually fall asleep, but Robbie hasn’t napped since he was 6 months old and he refuses to start now. I was talking to my boss about what I could do with Robbie to get him to sleep, and she encouraged me to get a positive reinforcement chart – to find something that Robbie really likes, and if he behaves during naptime, each day he can put a sticker on his chart. And of course, at the end of the week if he gets all five stickers, he’ll get the prize. The problem is finding out what Robbie wants. The kid is a mystery, and he’s really smart. He’s onto us and what we’re trying to do.

Friday I was trying to get him to sleep and as I lied there with him, I said, “Robbie if you go to sleep, I’ll get you a new toy. Do you want a new toy?�

“Nope.�

“But I’ll get you a Spiderman toy! Do you want a Spiderman toy?�

“Nope.�

I sighed, feeling like this whole positive reinforcement thing was a lost cause. Just then, he mechanically twisted his head towards me and said matter-of-factly, “I want a new drum set.�

Hmmmm…..the kid drives a hard bargain. Granted, Robbie does play the drums. Now I realize I’m the mom so I’m biased, but he plays them really well. My friend sent a video of him playing the drums at the age of 18 months to the Ellen DeGeneres Show, and they are trying to get him on there. And at one time, Robbie did have a drum set. A little one for a child, and he destroyed it because he rocked out on it too hard. I would love to get him a drum set, but the kind he wants costs about a thousand bucks. The kid definitely drives a hard bargain.

This was NOT something I wrote in my Funny Book. Although I have a feeling I’ll eventually be writing it in my check book.